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Recently I watched a Tamil movie called Irugapatru. It was after a long time I completed watching a movie at a stretch. It was a decently made movie with some good performances. What attracted me to the movie was its core theme - the importance of honest heartfelt communication in marriage.

The central character in the movie is a psychologist, specialized on marital counseling. She deals with numerous married couples and their problems almost every day. She is a patient listener, a necessary trait for a psychologist, and effectively finds solutions to her clients' problems. She has a very supportive husband at home. She leads a very happy life with her husband. Their life is free of any tensions and she makes it even more exciting with surprise gifts and trips with her husband.

The movie slowly gets interesting when her husband finds out that she was suppressing her true emotions all these while to avoid any fights or tensions. She didn't want the fate of her clients come in her life. So she programs her life (even takes help from a mobile app) in such a way that there is absolutely no space for any arguments between her and her husband. Her husband is very disappointed after knowing all that and how they eventually discover the true soul of their relationship forms the rest of the movie.

Communication is key in every relationships. According to me, the following are the key factors that make a relationship work.

Empathetic listening : We sometime get into this tendency to dominate in a conversation, without listening to the other side. What makes a relationship click is when the couple follows empathetic listening. Empathetic listening is about listening to someone with an intent to understand, rather than with an intent to respond.

Don't compromise, find third alternative : There is a misconception that to make a relationship work, you need to compromise on your priorities. Stephen Covey in his book on 7 habits of highly effective people talks about focusing on win-win in interpersonal relationship. If one side always is on lose, or perceived as lose, then that is going to affect the relationship. If a win-win is not possible, through effective communication you can find a third alternative that works for both of you.

Respect : Mutual respect is the foundation of a relationship. Respect starts when you acknowledge the fact that your partner has their own priorities and desires. Respect should be reflected in your behaviors, words and actions.

Spend quality time: Time is the most valuable asset in everyone's life. If you spend time with someone, you are indirectly telling that person that they are very important in your life. This why spending quality time with your partner is very important.

A heartfelt communication also brings trust in the relationship. If you know that your partner got your back when you are in need, that is a beautiful relationship.